2008年5月23日
Japanese Family Life (2)
Hi Everyone,
Thanks for your comments. I agree that it is not a good idea to trust figures produced by surveys unless you know exactly how the surveys were conducted, but I still think this topic makes an interesting talking point. The idea of couples sleeping in different bedrooms is a very interesting example of cultural differences. I remember being really shocked by this when I first heard a Japanese friend say that he slept in a different bedroom from his wife.
In my country (and probably most other Western countries), people would presume that a couple who were sleeping in separate bedrooms were going to get divorced. As someone mentioned, I think that there is a big difference in expectations of marriage in Japan compared with Western countries, and maybe that is why the divorce rate is lower. Anyway, it is a very interesting topic.
As all of you who follow American Idol know by now, the new Idol is David Cook. If you have not heard him sing yet, just type his name into the 'search' box on You Tube, and you can watch videos of all his best performances. This year, there were a lot of very talented people in the competition, and I think many of them will become big stars in the future. Possibly the most interesting person was a guy called Jason Castro. He has a very distinctive voice, and he is very good-looking. If you search for his name on You Tube, you can watch his performances as well. I recommned his version of 'Somewhere over the rainbow.' You can watch it by clicking here.
The weather forecast for this weekend is not very good, so I will probably use the time to catch up on some work. Whatever plans you have, I hope you all enjoy the weekend, and I will see you again on Monday.
Bye for now,
David
PS Here is another one of Jason Castro's great performances.
- Permalink
- ［今週のテーマ］
- Comments (9)
- Trackbacks (0)
Comments
I have a gay friend who told me this joke. Can you understand it?
Q: How do you stop gays from having sex?
A: Legalize gay marriage.
- David
- 2008年5月23日 17:21
Hi David,
Q: How do you stop gays from having sex? (同性愛者の性交渉を止めるには？)
A: Legalize gay marriage. (同性愛者の結婚を認めればいいのさ。)
つまり、結婚すれば飽きてしなくなるっていうジョークですか？
- Tomo
- 2008年5月23日 17:29
Hi David,
It means monogamy, doesn't it?
It's just a quick response, so I'll think and post later.
Anne
- Anne
- 2008年5月23日 17:32
Hi again,
Related to joke, monogamy→less physical contact means....answer.
I like Jason Castro's ' Hallelujah' very much. He is so lovely, isn't he?
Have a nice weekend.
Anne
- Anne
- 2008年5月23日 22:52
Hi David,
Yes, the cultural difference(the idea of couples sleeping in different bedrooms) is interesting. Is there a big difference in expectations of marriage in Japan compared with Western countries? What are expectations of marriage in your country? You mean, in your country, all couples sleep together and have physical contact, and if they don't have physical contact, they are going to get divorced?
I think we have talked about it before that in Japan, when we have a baby, we(mothers) sleep in the same bedroom with the baby. I think that's when we start to sleep in different bedrooms(or beds) from our husbands. I still sleep with my daughter.
I said that I didn't sleep together with my husband, but it doesn't mean we don't have, or I don't want to have physical contact. I think physical contact is also important including kissing, hugging, or holding hands(not just having sex). I think 'mental contact'(communication) is more important, though.
Actually, there is a problem between my husband and me. I like sleeping in 'bed' , but my husband likes sleeping on the floor. He says if he sleeps in a bed, he'll get stiff shoulders and neck or backaches, so we can't sleep together. Well, if I sleep with him, I can't sleep well because he is a loud snorer! Oops, it's a secret(笑).
Have a great weekend and see you soon.
Tomo
- Tomo
- 2008年5月24日 00:20
Hi David and everyone,
What is the difference of expectation of marriage?
In Japan, it is true that sleeping in different room doesn't necessarily mean the sign of getting divorced. As Tomo said, usually the start of it would be the birth of a baby. Around me, some of my friends don't sleep in the same room. Last year, when my husband returned home from hospital, my friend asked me hesitantly, " Do you share the bed or bedroom with your husband?" I answered," Yes." Then she said," It's good for both of you. A lot of couples sleep in separate rooms, but I don't think it's a good idea. I mean mentally, not physically." We seldom talk about such kind of things, and it was a little bit annoying topic, but I totally agree with her. Personally, I've been sleeping in the same room except 1~2 years while children were babies. Waking up in the morning in the same room , or sharing some kind of feeling is cozy and important for us, even though I am irritated by his snoring when I am in a bad mood!
By the way, I found an interesting interview on BBC radio women's hour, family＋relationship titled " Can a relationship survive couples sleeping apart?" According to it, many would be embarrassed to admit to sleeping in separate beds,but some feel a luxury to aspire it. Actually, the word' survive', or 'reveal terrible truth'(in the interview) seem to show the feelings of couples in UK. But is situation changing?
If you are interested in it, type 'BBC radio women's hour', you can find the website.
Good night,
Anne
- Anne
- 2008年5月24日 23:28
Hi David and everyone,
Did you have a nice weekend?
I want to share with you what I felt about the usage of the word I posted last Saturday. There, I used the word 'annoying' to express " 少しとまどう、困惑する（こんわくする）"。When I wrote the comment, I didn't check, and didn't consider that much, and used it because it came to my mind first. But after that, I wondered if I didn't express what I wanted to say precisely.
My sentence was 'It's annoying topic.'(Honestly I want to avoid this kind of topic, so I wanted to to say"少し戸惑う、困惑する" as I mentioned. I never get angry with this kind of topic, so I thought I should have written ' It's an embarrassing topic.' ( I'm not ashamed , though...) I read the usage of 'embarrassing' in David's book, but still I'm not sure... So, members, do you have any good ideas?
Bye for now,
Anne
- Anne
- 2008年5月26日 12:07
Hi Anne,
About your question, I would say..
It's kind of embarrassing / It's a kind of embarrassing topic.(the same as your second idea)
I guess you want to avoid talking about that kind of topic because you feel embarrassed.
By the way, I checked BBC radio women's hour you mentioned, then I typed 'couples sleeping apart' into the search box in Google UK, and there are a lot of articles about that topic. I read some of them. Maybe the situation is changing in UK.
See you later,
PS David, I'm looking forward to your new entry!
- Tomo
- 2008年5月26日 13:57
Hi everyone,
‘The word of the day’ on my desk calendar today says, “Love makes you blind but marriage brings back your sight.”(The original word is in Japanese.) I knew it!